An Autumn Song

If I could wear your smile
Or be as stringent as you are;
If I could look above the thinning skyline
And spread my hands like a bare-thread scarecrow,
Filling my lungs with  solid mass of solitary air,
I would not muse again
Or let me voice break.

I watch the sparrows gather twigs
Make careful nests, in clumsy evenings,
when I have no place to visit,
no men to see.
I watch the rain make patterns on window sills.
I watch and make a thousand wish
Placing a detached eyelash on the back of my hand
I smile, inward,
Miss certain roads, certain avenues,
Certain fallen leaves before Summer came.

Past and Present merge
I turn over a new leaf
All the time knowing,
It's not that I don't love you anymore.
Rather, my love, like a pouting child, has hidden her face
In stubborn and childish anger,
In deaf refusal,
Alone, so alone.